My life is not really that hard, it just seems that way sometimes. I'm just a poor black man stuck way too far down south trying to make each day a little better than the last.

Wednesday, October 01, 2008

Need Advice. Need to vent..I don't know.

Let's begin this way.

Question....Your significant other is working late and has school that evening. So he asks you to bring him a change of clothes( his car isn't working). So you drive to his job, pick him up something to eat, sit around for 40 minutes waiting for him to finish his paper and drive him to school. You also drove him to work this morning and have to pick him up from school afterwards. After all this you would expect some appreciation at least a thank you. Know what I got a funky ass attitude because he didn't particularly like the clothes I brought him. So I call him out on that. Know what I got. Not a apology or a my bad. I got a " you should have known better" and I didn't get a thank you because "help from your boyfriend is expected" and after he got agreement from his mom he apparently is completely justified in his behavior and opinion.
The thing about LJ(yeah his name is LJ too) as that he quite often needs help...he just does but he hates asking for help. Mention the fact that you did him a favor and he gets all pissy and starts with "you don't ever have to do nothing for me again" bullshit. At this point this is a relationship that started well and is hitting the wall and I'm thinking maybe it's time to let this one go before it gets too much farther because at the present moment it's feeling a lot like the last one.

If you really believe you don't have to be thankful for the things your partner does for you just because he's your partner. I don't know what to say to that. I think that's the definition of taking someone for granted.

We got into a big fight this morning while I was driving him to work and I said some thing I shouldn't have and I can own up to the fact that I was wrong. That's more than I can say for him. I'm going to try to talk to him this evening and clear this up like adults. He'll either be receptive or he won't. If not then maybe another bites the dust.

7 Comments:

Blogger Soldier said...

No way.... i'm sorry but u HAVE to be thankful for anything that anybody does for you in your lifetime.

Parents, friends, strangers, whatever...

I had that debate with my mother a while ago cause she wouldn't thank me after i did stuff for her, talkin bout she gave birth to me... i was like " woman, u need to fly back to this earth fast, nobody asked u to make kids especially not the kids themselves ! "

9:44 AM

 
Blogger Darius T. Williams said...

Lord...just pray. LOL.

11:05 AM

 
Blogger bLaQ~n~MiLD said...

I know that's right@ soldier! I had to let my moms know the same way. You CHOOSE to have me, I DID not have a say on that faithful day/night.

Yo, if dude doesn't appreciate the things you do for him, you have to make a decision for your own sake. Know your worth even if he doesn't, period!

~Damnit!

3:47 PM

 
Blogger JACK said...

oh - no, no, no. Dique ungrateful ... if you think you deserve shit, then you're horse is way too tall. You are being way too nice to that boy ... I'm just sayin ...

1:45 PM

 
Blogger fuzzy said...

I think you should be able to expect these types of things from your boyfriend! He is supposed to be there for you and help you out. After you expect it, and it's delivered, then you show appreciation! That's only in order!

8:25 AM

 
Blogger yet another black guy said...

Not to play the devil's advocate, but I also hate when someone throws something in my face. But hopefully, he'll understand that a little gratitude - a simple thank you - is sometimes enough to quell the tide of discontent.

2:00 AM

 
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